Wednesday, May 30, 2012

Who's Your Daddy?


I just read an email from Juliet. She said I sounded interesting. She said she came across a picture of me and liked it so much, she downloaded it. She said I seemed like a man she would like to get to know. 

 Kelli can be a man's name...and also a dogs. When I was young, there was a dog in the neighborhood named Kelly. As cute as it was, no girl likes to share her name with a dog. In elementary school there was a boy in my grade named Kelly. (horror)  But he spelled it with a "Y"...as in boY. 

My mom told me she spelled my named with an "i" because it was the feminine version. One time, on a middle school field trip, they were dividing the girls into their cabins. My name was never called. What seemed like hours later, they realized they had put me in the boys cabin. Yep, that's every middle schools girls dream...to be mistaken for a boy. So much for Kelli with an "i". I started to wear more pink. Pretty sure there was a training bra in there somewhere. Maybe that's where my obsession with heels started.

But, I digress...

Juliet, Juliet, Juliet! Wonder what manly man traits you find so attractive and  "interesting" in me? I do have that one annoying, but very manly chin hair. I don't think I have a mustache...better start waxing just in case. I wouldn't be able to change your flat tire or fix things around the house. I don't make enough money to keep you in a fashion you would find "interesting". I COULD cook you a delicious steak. hm..maybe we would have some things in common,  This could open new doors! Closet doors! Maybe I will ask for your picture....and of course your shoe size:)

Juliet wants to know if we could meet sometime. She doesn't want me to make her wait and "suffer". I'm just the kind of man she  has been waiting for. 

Ever since I shopped for heath insurance on line, I have been getting a lot of spam-o-licous E-mail. Do I need a car loan? Would I like any higher education? Would I like my penis enhanced? (Maybe Juliet got wind of this.........) 

Juliet, I'm not the man you think I am. I am Kelli~ with an "i'. 

But, you can call me Butch. 

2 comments:

  1. Toni with an "i"....I had the same issues in grammar school Kelli with and "i". Toni was a boy's name, I was told. I didn't like my name until way later when I was out of school. Then I liked it. My name was not common. I didn't know many other Toni with an "i" girls. Even today I get emails addressed to Tony with a "y". They know I'm a girl and still I get Tony with a "y". My work email clearly spells out my name Toni with an "i"...and still they call me Tony...Oh well!!!

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  2. You are the most beautiful Toni with an i I have ever known. No one would ever mistake you for a boy:)

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