Friday, April 17, 2015

Woman Years



Hellooo 56! 

56. That's getting up there...in Woman Years.

56. I have to practice saying it.

Just like the year, when a new comes along in January. 

 56, in 2015....

Yesterday, FB reminded me it was my birthday. 

"Kelli Thomas's 56th Birthday
tomorrow"

Well, now I know! 

What else do I know? On each birthday, I like to reflect on what I've learned through the year. 

 This wisdom of age and grace of the years....

Sometimes, I just want confirmation that what I've learned/believe to be true..its actually true!

"The soul rejoices in hearing what it already knows" 

I also like learning about the absurd. Like new made up words. Words which, when used enough, actually become "real" words. Words hoping to find their mysterious destiny on a page in the dictionary! Like the Velveteen Rabbit..Real.  (i.e., tweet, Google as a verb, Lol)  It just so happens that "we the people" can change the language. 

I'm keeping track of these words. Not real yet..just hanging around trying to become useful.

Hangry. This is when you  are cranky or angry because you are hungry. 
(can I get a witness?) 

Multi-slacking. (not a wise thing to do while at work...) 

Adorkable. I find our new puppy pretty adorkable when he runs down my hallway - big ears flapping and paws growing faster than his little stick legs and balance can adjust to. He ends up looking like the little boy trying to run in his fathers' dress shoes. Adorkable. 

Defriend made its way into the dictionary. I don't think I defended anyone this year. I love my adorkable friends! And if I did, it was probably because I was hangry. 

Woman Years...

I see them in decades. The victory is to slip out of them gracefully, without leaving claw marks. And why would we want to go back? Those years are spent. One of the most valuable questions I ask myself is: "Kelli, did you do your best?" 

Yes, I did my best. Even in the dark times. 

Women often do their best, deepest, most genuine growing in the dark times. Like the "I-did-not-know-this-about-myself-before-truth." Like the most shinning clear and resolute truths. We grow beautiful in that. Like a Moon flower...

In the decade of a woman's 20's, she'd be wise to learn to:

 Carry your most central, essential childhood friends with you. The one's you did all the crazy, stupid, fun, sweet, brave, self destructive things together. After all, you helped raise each other.

Dear Sweet 20 Year Old, please know the difference between love...and a restraining order. 

Dear Sweet 20 Year Old, you will probably start a family in this decade. This is when your life will end...and begin again. Another, "I-did-not-know-this-about-myself-before-moment" And it's not something you can be told. You have to experience it for your self - the moment your heart explodes into the most authentic love you will ever feel.

Woman Years..

The 30's can be a blur. But, energy abounds!  Hang in there..

Woman Years..

The 40's. The 40's are great for a woman. We find resilience, faith, strength, and nerve. 

"It takes courage to grow up and become who you truly are"- EE Cummings. 

The 50's:

We grow wise with age. We've earned the right to believe what we want to believe. 

I believe the studies that say coffee is a superfood! Just the facts, baby:

"Coffee contains lots of antioxidants (it's the biggest source of antioxidants in an average Western diet!) that help the body fight chemicals called “free radicals.” As a result, coffee drinkers are at a lower risk of diseases such as Parkinson’s Disease, Type II Diabetes, and Heart Disease."

See! If I combine this superfood with another super-activity like a crossword puzzle while sitting at my favorite coffee shop, it puts a positive spin on "multi-slacking."

Did you know that too much exercise can be bad for you? Yep! (So says my favorite study!) I didn't even cry when my daughter sold the elliptical. It was a little sad after all those years of sharing a room together...but honestly, I did all the work in that relationship...

When the waitress brought bread to our ladies night table, one of my girlfriends said "A recent study showed that women with a little extra padding live longer."
We choose wise friends...with good timing...
Pass the butter....

Women my age become more deliberate about the one short life we have. 

"We pray to God, but keep rowing to the shore."

We are here to build a house, and furnish it with the love we gather up. 

It's 4am. I am packing and gathering up my things. I have a flight to catch. It seems when you feed your friends growing, hungry, preadolescent children, they remember..and invite you to their weddings;) I love weddings! Especially the I do's, witnessing a house being built, furnished- and being apart of the love gathered together. 

  What a wonderful thing to be doing on this 56th birthday in the midst of  Woman Year, 2015

I see cake in my future:)



Thursday, April 2, 2015

Special Ride

Families with special needs children are riding along a bumpy road. We reach for the GPS because we often feel quite lost. It’s just that..we’re not so sure of our destination or whether to take the “fastest route” or the “shortest route” just please don't take us in those weird little circles.

 Personally, I’d like to avoid too many twist and turns. Little voice coming down from the heavens, I want to “avoid dirt roads” - this ride is messy enough. Please “avoid toll roads.” Toll roads are just too taxing….

Is that a lot to expect from a GPS? Surely there’s a Special app for that…

 We’d love a comforting, knowing voice to announce the next road to take and how close we are to the next available rest stop. We’re tired! 

We often feel like we’re are traveling alone - that’s why we pick up strangers along the way. 


Meet Jackson Gillman.


Also known as the Stand-Up Chameleon!

Once a stranger and now fellow traveler on this ride with our Special One. He gave Aidan his first smile of the day as he sang silly songs and used Aidan's body as an instrument. Tapping on his fingers, playing his ribcage, knocking on his knees. He used Aidan's hands to tell a story using each finger as a member of a family who ended up living in Aidan's heart. 

This was music therapy at its storytelling best. What a wonderful human being. I'm so glad we crossed paths. 

 Complete strangers put air in our tires. Gas us up, so to speak. Anne Lamott says "laughter is carbonated holiness" and I would agree:) 

 This road is hard, but it makes us soft.

The view from this windshield makes us look at life a little differently.

We are forced to slow down, speed up, miss a few exits. 

I could flood a road with my tears when I think about the things Aidan misses.

Sports, school, birthday parties, a voice. A normal meal. Playgrounds.Walking across a room. 

But the emergency vehicles arrive just in time. 
They repair the damage caused by grief.
The Life Support Team. 
You know who you are. 

 We roll on...

A lesson is learned with each lap around this track.
Like the race car driver attacking the complexities of the turns.
It's about focus and occasionally requires lightning speed reflexes to stay upright and clarity on how to make wise decisions.

Sometimes we're able to experience a victory lap. 


If you do too..give yourselves a round of applause!

Receive your metal!

This metal of Endurability...

We are not having much victory with this hospital stay. Aidan is not tolerating being in ketosis. He's not keeping anything down and is sleeping the day away. The pit crew has had a meeting and we are on to plan B. 




We're Realists.
Expecting miracles...

Amen, and so it is.