Saturday, August 4, 2018

Do It Again



When I was in California, I repeatedly commented on the beautiful weather to my mom.

It was fortifying and refreshing.

I found I wanted to be outside more than I wanted to be inside.

In my home state of Virginia, especially in July and August, I can only take so much of the heat, humidity, gnats, and mosquitoes. I need to get inside just to feel normal again.

I could tell, that for my mom, it was just the norm because Californians are used to one beautiful day after the next beautiful day after the next beautiful day.

It made me question what I may be becoming dulled to in my life.

Am I unaware of irreplaceable experiences right in front of me?

Today's reading included these thoughts:

"Because children have abounding vitality, because they are in spirit fierce and free, therefore they want things repeated and unchanged. They always say "Do it again"; and the grown-up person does it again until she is nearly dead. Is it possible that God says every morning, "Do it again" to the sun: and every evening "Do it again" to the moon? It may not be automatic necessity that makes all daisies alike; it may be that God makes every daisy separately, but has never got tired of making them."

Blessings to be noted today:

Morning coffee

Aidan's laugh

Homemade guacamole

A home that serves as a sanctuary for a world-weary spirit

People who give my life meaning

Vivaldi's Four Seasons

Any time left with my mom

On this reflective Saturday, it's thoughts like this that make an ordinary day extraordinary.

Do it again. :)





Tuesday, July 3, 2018

An Anniversary

Some years fly by. 

Some anniversaries are back in a flash.

Not this one. 

I've felt every single measuring unit of this year. 

July 3rd, 2018 marks one year since the fire. 



Coming home from a visit with my mom in California, I opened the door to our Floyd home. 

 My throat and nose filled with the stench of thick smoke. 

I wasn't even sure what I was looking at. I shut the door quickly then opened it again to try and make sense of the what I saw. 

A huge hole in the floor where the ceiling fan fell through. Everything was a charred mess. 



We had been robbed, and the house set afire. 

I woke slowly this morning, thoughts dulled until the memory dawned. 

It's been a year. 

I let the memories come while still in a cocoon of blankets. 

"My joy has flown away:
grief has settled on me. 
My heart is sick"~ Jeremiah 8:18

My heart was sick. 

From the same bed, I text a friend to tell her what happened. 

She replied:

"I'm coming to you right now." 

And she did. 

Many people came alongside my family during that time.

Reminding me that Hope comes alongside seasons of despair. 

"We can be mended, and we mend each other."

Today, I remind myself:

Life is full of unwelcome events. 

Life is under no obligation to edit out all the rough patches. 

Hope is a vital part of life, and it really doesn't take a huge amount! It's kin to faith and only takes a mustard seed portion to be effective. 

I am never alone. 

My God is El Roi. "The God who sees me."

I have counted my losses and saved the memories. 

 And Hope whispers: "The story isn't over.."

A year later, I am feeling a little more freed up from grief. 

Thank you for letting me share this anniversary with you, dear readers. 

Let freedom ring.

















Monday, January 1, 2018

Dear 2018

Dear 2018,

Welcome!

I don't think I have ever wanted to see a year end as much as I did 2017.

2017, you were full of yourself.

 Full of challenges, health issues, loss and heartbreak.

 2017, while we are still on speaking terms I want you to know I've come to appreciate the lessons you taught.

"There are years that ask questions and years that answer"~ Zora Neale Hurston

2017, you left me asking a lot of questions. Mostly the Why questions as many people do when misfortune arrives (totally uninvited) in their lives.

It's not a useless question, it's just that they don't matter. That's when you shake hands with acceptance. It's fertile ground where you learn new strategies for living in a world that continues to move on in spite of your loss.

2017, the most beautiful lesson I learned living with you for the past year was personally experiencing the Lord's grand exchange of "beauty for ashes."

It's a real thing.

When you scoop up the rubble and ashes of your life and hand them over to the God of the Universe, He takes the ashes~ and in exchange, He presents you with the making of an exquisite bouquet.  One stem at a time. It's as humbling and heartwarming as a child who presents you with a dandelion "picked just for you!"

My bouquet is getting quite full now.

My vessel doesn't feel so empty.

It's quite an artistic arrangement! Build from the sacred work of loving family members, friends and co-workers who echoed and reminded me of God's love and care.

Thanks for that 2017.

2018, don't think you are getting off easy just because 2017 is such an easy act to follow!

I do have certain expectations of you.



We can  work together.

Lets see what beauty we can create.

"And now let us welcome the New Year full of things that have never been."