Grocery Shopping Diaries

Some traditions are just not sound. Like my tradition of shopping for my Thanksgiving menu on the eve of Thanksgiving. I like to wait till the very last minute for things.  This adds excitement to my life. This allows me to avoid things like bungie jumping. It's my extreme sport...procrastinating.

I'm sorry to say, I have passed this trait along to at least one of my children.
You know who you are....
I may have passed on my talent for misplacing things...or completely losing them. And, I'm sorry to say, the same child got this little gem too.
You know who you are.....
But, it is also why none of my children ever got in trouble for forgetting their lunch, or losing their coat.
It happens to the best of us. (but, mostly me...)

But, I digress...

So, THIS year things will be different. I decide to break it up a bit, and at least get the turkey a few days before so I am not stuck buying the 300 pound frozen mutant turkey (because the extra large ones are the only ones left) which leaves no time for it to defrost. Even in this age of global warming. It goes into the oven cold and stays there until it's little button pops up...and we are all starving...

Nope, this year will be different..

Before I leave for the grocery store my daughter hands me a wad of coupons. This is her new hobby, saving money. I like it.

I get my cart and I'm feeling pretty good about having two whole days before the big one! I go straight to the meat department. It's not the three or four lonely looking turkeys in a big almost empty case that I'm used to seeing, the ones who may not be the main attraction in a families Thanksgiving meal.(while all the other foods on the menu are considered merely "sides".) The ones who may have sacrificed their lives only to become  the sale item in the next weeks flyer. These turkeys are stacked two deep...all across the case.
I choose the one that I feel like wants to come home with me....it doesn't have a head, but, I believe it winks at me....;)

Now, I can people watch..and listen to conversations while I cruse the isles. Like the earthy looking father who turns to his son who is about 7 and says "How bout I saute the spinach in garlic...." and the son replies "YES!!" That child probably has NO idea what a Twinkie is...or was.( May it rest in peace....forever)

My favorite was a mother daughter team. A young mom with a cart so full she must have surely left her  other two (or ten)  children at home. Her young daughter, probably about 5 was carefully pushing her baby bother in a stroller behind her mother. We were going down the isles in opposite directions so we would pass each other for many loops around several isles. I would always speak to the little girl when we got to a new isle..and it started to become sort-of funny when we would turn and see each other at either end of the next isle...and I would hear her say to her mother "there is the nice lady".
And, that's what I want to be...

Meanwhile, I am fascinated by these coupons. Two of them are just like checks. Kroger checks. Free money.  One check for two dollars and one for three. Five free dollars. Ok. I'll take it. Thank you Kroger. If I didn't have so many other things to be thankful for, I could at least be thankful for these:) I use all the coupons. I'm surely saving money....I have no list..but, my cart is filling up. I decide its time to go home. After all, I really DO need to make a list and come back tomorrow night, to get the things I actually need for my Thanksgiving meal.

I'm at the check out. I unload my groceries. I happen to look behind me and notice that the folks in my line only have a few items.. holding them in the little baskets like handbags. I turn to the check out girl and say "oh...is this an express line?" She says it is, but, not to worry about it. I have way more than 20 items. (it's the coupons fault...)  I'm not the "nice lady" anymore...(where is my little girl to tell them?) I'm the obnoxious "the rules don't apply to me lady". ugh. Now, I have express lane guilt. I start to bag my own items while she rings them up. I start to wonder about the check I just deposited. It's not the most reliable check...and did I get it in before 2? No, I didn't. Oh good grief...how am I going to pay for this Zillion dollar bill? I need Barack Obama now! :) But, all is well. Miracles happen. I say I'm sorry to the people in my line. I feel forgiven.

I have my turkey. And, I get to go back tomorrow and do it all again. It's a wonderful life..:)